Monday, June 11, 2007

Stop looking through the peephole. You look like a cameraman

Why have I not been updatey? Cuz, I haven't really been doing much knitting. I've been painting and moving and unpacking and organizing and decorating and cleaning and biting the heads off bats. Oh wait. Forget that last one. I haven't been doing that one....yet.
I am delving into that wonderful, yet overly mathematical world of design. But my flakiness and fickletude is getting the better of me, and I'm starting to feel defeated by it. In the last 5 years, I have flirted with at least 5 different career paths. It isn't that I'm not ambitious or that I'm lazy. It's that I truly want to do everything. I want to be a writer, a knitwear designer, a rock star, and every other superiorly fun thing out there. This life is simply too short to do one thing forever. However, once I get into something, I always find a reason to give up. I think I'm just overwhelmed by all the possibilities. I do have a few things that I'm working on, but I really hate talking about it to people b/c I know everyone thinks I'm a flake and that I won't follow through on it. So rather than get all excited and make myself look like a giant ass when I put it aside later, I'll just keep it to myself and try very hard to ignore that part of me that wants to surrender to mediocrity.

1 comment:

Helen said...

heh. i hear ya. i really should be writing. it's my degree, it's my passion, yadda yadda. yet how much of a passion can it truly be if i don't bother to do it? We will see where my current career takes me. who knows, maybe we'll be like the half of the population where he makes all the dough and i can sit at home with the kids and knit all day. even though i always said i would never do that because i paid for my degree, dangit! but i wouldn't ever dream of my kids growing up in daycare and with sitters. hmmmmm
see ya soon! Keep working on that gorgeous house of yours :)