Monday, September 18, 2006
Mama and the toddler
We have our differences. He enjoys jumping in mud puddles and licking worms. I do not. I enjoy being clean and um, not licking worms. Some days we are the best of friends, giggling over the things that make toddlers giggle and just generally digging each other's company. Some days it seems that his entire purpose is to try to get me to tear out my hair, and I, in turn seem to aim only to ruin his fun. There is definitely a delicate balance between the stay-at-home mom and her child that I've not quite mastered but am figuring out as I go. Perrin and I spend all day every day together; that kind of arrangement is sure to drive anybody stone-cold bonkers. And like with any relationship, it's easy to lose sight of how to get along. It's easy to slip into a place where it's hard to relate to one another, so we stop trying to see the world through the other's eyes. I know it's hard to be 2 yrs old and want so desperately to have some control over your world but be unable to share that with the one person who is always there to tell you what to do. Sure it's a pain in the ass to clean the kiddo up after he's wallowed around in mud, but the excitement on his face is worth it. This world is a daily adventure for him, and it's often so easy to forget that things that I've seen a million times are still new to him. He's not yet desensitized to anything; maybe I'm jealous of that in my adult cynicism. Wouldn't it be great if we could hold onto that part of ourselves that never feels rushed or organized? Why is it so hard for me to remember and so easy to want to hurry him up when he's watching ants for ten minutes? Being a mom gives us a second chance to see the world as a child does, and I think it's more of a challenge for some of us than others to slow down. For a toddler, there's always time for everything. Maybe that's the attitude we should all have.